This blog is dedicated to my wonderful husband and his favorite shoes. I love you babe!
Several years ago, when I was pregnant with my daughter, my family decided to go on a camping trip to see some national parks. We rented a little camper; strapped it to a truck and off we went from Texas all the way to the Canadian border. We made many stops along the way and really enjoyed some family time and seeing some beautiful sights. My morning sickness was a bit of an annoyance because the jig-jig-jig of the camper giving resistance to the truck made it a bumpy ride. I munched on my snacks while on the road because that seemed to ease the nausea. I ate a lot of snacks…
Once we reached a national park, we would unhitch the trailer and stay for several days. At the end of each day, my happy husband, beaming from being around nature, would step inside our 10-foot trailer and take his shoes off. Hmm. How do I say this? My nausea would quickly return. Day after day, those shoes quickly became my nemesis. He would climb into bed and close the little curtain around our bed that trapped the smell inside our sleeping area. I munched on some ginger candies trying to fight it. Inevitably I would ask my husband if he could wash his feet, but I could tell that was annoying him. He would do it, but he would huff about it. But what was a pregnant lady supposed to do, just be nauseous?
I was enjoying the trip, but at the same time I started feeling grouchy, and I began complaining. I was pregnant, nauseous, getting fatter every minute from the enormity of snacks I was consuming, and then ending each day with the smelly shoes! I wanted to chunk them into the national forest and speed away. I was irritable and snippy with my words.
One day, I headed into a nearby bathroom by the trailers and shut the door and proceeded to have my pity party in front of God. I felt like God was in on this somehow. In anger I asked God, “What are you doing here in this?” A soft answer came back to me, “Refining you.” This answer did not make me feel any better. “For what?! Or to do what?!” I asked. And then he answered, “Tolerance of situations and people.” Uhhhhh! That was not what I wanted to hear. I didn’t want to be tolerant of situations I didn’t like. I wanted freedom to say whatever I wanted. I wanted permission to be mad, bitter and annoyed, but obviously God didn’t want me to continue in life this way.
He then moved on my heart to tell me that tonight, when my husband took his shoes off, I was to keep my mouth shut and not say anything. Not a word. Not a request for feet washing. Nothing. I was going to have to hold my tongue. This was going to be harder than I thought. So there in the camp stall, I surrendered. I told God, “Okay, but you have to help me see things differently.” In order to be tolerant of situations and people, I was going to need a new set of eyes. I was going to need his eyes and his perspective.
This was more than keeping my mouth shut; this was an open door to a new way of living, and a way of being content in all situations. As Paul said in Philippians 4:12, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.”
I was talking to my friend one day about that verse and then yelled, “Paul! What’s the secret!!??” Well, the next verse says (Phil4:13), “ I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Paul had been imprisoned, shipwrecked, beaten by mobs and much more, but he could be content because his source was not himself, or his own logic. His joy was not determined by his circumstances. His source was to live through God who gave him strength.
It is by God’s strength that we can be content. It is by God’s strength that we can do the things that should not be possible, because we team up with him. We need his help to do these things: to shut our mouths when needed, to speak when we want to be silent, to help others when we don’t have time, and to be content in all situations.
That night was not easy. The shoes came off, and the smell got trapped again by the curtain, and I had an arsenal of ginger and cinnamon candies by my pillow. I turned away, wrapped the blanket around my face and just about cringed to keep my mouth shut. But I did it! This silly thing was a victory. God’s help was there, but I had to use my will to fight my natural desires, my flesh. God didn’t mind me going through some uncomfortable moments so that I would have the opportunity to walk through a bigger door—a door of freedom from self, a door of self-control. He was handing me a larger gift, if I was willing to take it and begin the walk to grow in it.
Maturing is never an easy thing. It requires stretching and uncomfortable moments, but by God’s strength, we can build new habits and trash our old norms. How do people expect you will react to things? Is it positive? Do you feel that you can’t change that? You can. Ask God for help! He wants good things for us. Isn’t it better to have joy in any situation than speaking your opinionated mind?
What area are you feeling God calling you to mature in?
Personally, I can tell you that right now, it is in how I relate to my children. I am cringing on the inside, but I long for the person I will have become on the other side of this growing period.
We must rely on God’s strength and ASK HIM FOR IT. Let’s not waste time going through the same issues time after time. If it is time for us to grow up, then so be it. I can do all things through Him who gives me strength, and so can you!
Abiding with God, means doing life with Him. With Him. We are never alone. We will have to fight our flesh and our natural tendencies, but it will be worth it…and all our family members said…. Amen!
Be blessed & be a blessing!
